It’s getting seriously hot in here …
When most people imagine BDSM relationships, their thoughts jump to images of “50 Shades Of Grey”, bondage, abuse, blood and/or demeaning objectification.
Relationships within the world of BDSM — an acronym meaning Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/submission, and Sadism/Masochism — vary widely.
So while yes, some of those descriptors apply to some BDSM relationships, they certainly do not apply to all, and certainly not without the consent, interest, desire and fulfillment of both partners in mind at all times.
At the core of any relationship — vanilla, kinky, friendly, casual, or even professional — is an “exchange of power.”
In fact, many traditional marriages falter because of a lack of communication in regard to this dynamic.
Prior to an engagement and wedding, each individual has an idealized vision of how power will be exchanged within their marriage.
Some imagine a 50/50 division of household, financial and parenting responsibilities. Some imagine a traditional household à la the 1950s, with the husband taking on financial obligations and the wife taking on child-rearing and household duties, or vice versa. Some imagine shared financial duties between spouses, with a nanny and housekeeper taking care of everything at home.
The variations are endless.
None of these arrangements are inherently good or bad. The trouble arises when a couple marries or otherwise makes a long-term commitment without having expressed these perspectives and ideas to each other beforehand.
The common fall-back of “We love each other, so we’ll make it work” basically guarantees a trip to divorce court.
BDSM relationships can be particularly satisfying because, when consciously formed, there is direct and ongoing communication about roles and responsibilities.
Whether the relationship takes the shape of Dom/sub, Domme/sub, Daddy/babygirl, Master/pet, Master/slave, Master/servant, Top/bottom or anything else you could probably think of, the keys to success are the intrinsic trust, transparency and shared control which must be present at all times.
And, of course, on a purely primal level, these dynamics played out in the bedroom are just so damn hot.
If you can read these 21 BDSM love quotes representing the best and hottest of D/s relationships without steaming up the windows, hey, that’s cool! To each their own.
(But I have a teeny, tiny feeling you may just like what you see …)
1. “When a man truly loves a woman she becomes his weakness. When a woman truly loves a man he …