Why be someone’s better half when you can be your own whole?
Romantic comedies are often the films we turn to when we need a fun pick-me-up. They make us laugh, cry, and want to be in love.
These movies can also instill a pretty dangerous message in us. They relay the message that we become better when we’re in love, that it takes a love interest for us to become our best selves, and that we’ll never be truly happy unless we’re in love. But that’s not true!
Don’t get me wrong, I love romantic comedies. But it’s easy to get sick of the constant rhetoric that romantic love is the greatest thing in life and that there’s something missing in your life if you don’t have a partner. That couldn’t be farther from the truth!
There are plenty of positives to being single. Sure, it’s nice to have someone to come home to after work but that someone can be a beloved pet that doesn’t care if you take off your bra and pants and slouch into the couch with a tub of ice cream the second you get home. It can be Netflix — you can Netflix and chill by yourself, and watch any show or movie you want without having to wait for your S.O. to watch the next episode.
You can do whatever you want and not feel judged and that’s a freeing feeling in itself.
One of the best things about being single is the necessity to dedicate time to yourself. Being single makes you realize your life is what you make it. Sure, a relationship might have an impact on that, but no other human being should have jurisdiction over who you are or your happiness. No one else should guide your path. They can walk with you, but it is your path. If you search inside yourself, you will find the way.
The best thing you can do for yourself, whether you’re in between romances, pining after an ex or a crush, or have bitterly sworn off love altogether, is to fall in love with the single life. That mostly means falling in love with yourself. That can seem harder than falling in love with another person but your first and longest relationship is with yourself so it’s essential to be happy alone.
The thing is, you don’t need somebody else. All you need is yourself (and good friends and family, though friends can also be family).
There are plenty of other people that know how wonderful the single life can be. Philosophers that lived centuries ago wrote about being single; rappers and musicians have sung about it for as long as music has been around.
There are loads of reminders as to why being single is better than any other state of being — so here are 50.
1. Your relationship status doesn’t define you.
“Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you’re pretty sexy and you’re taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.” — Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City
2. You can’t always depend on others, but you can depend on yourself.
“I like being single, I’m always there when I need me.” — Art Leo
3. Being single is not a bad thing.
“I love being single. It’s my choice, not a sentence. It’s not a state that I’m in until someone better comes along. Don’t feel sorry for me. I love my life.” — Sarah Morgan
4. It gives you time to work on yourself.
“Being single doesn’t necessarily mean you’re available. Sometimes you have to put up a sign that says, ‘Do Not Disturb’ on your heart.” — Wiz Khalifa
5. One of the world’s greatest thinkers knew relationships are overrated.
“[Marriage] happens as with cages: the birds without despair to get in, and those within despair of getting out.” — Michel de Montaigne
6. “Single” is a bit of a misnomer.
“ … I told her that I thought single was a stupid term. It made it sound like you were unattached to anyone, unconnected to anything. I preferred the term singular. As in individual.” — David Levithan
7. Being on your own is the best way to work on yourself.
“Solitude is the place of purification.” — Martin Buber
8. There’s something a little messed up about the expectation that a relationship is necessary.
“How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.” — Anais Nin
9. Self-love is all you need.
“I am a lover without a lover. I am lovely and lonely and I belong deeply to myself.” — Warsan Shire
10. It’s as simple as being able to do whatever you want.
“I love being single. I can come and go as I please and stay out as late as I want to.” — Eric Dickerson
11. It’s for the best.
“Single lady, the man you want might not necessarily be the man you need.” — Martha Macharia
12. The most difficult things in life can be the most rewarding.
“It is good to be lonely, for being alone is not easy. The fact that something is difficult must be one more reason to do it.” — Rilke
13. You are the only one who can understand yourself and make yourself happy.
“No human being can really understand another, and no one can arrange another’s happiness.” — Graham Greene
14. Focus on yourself.
“Being single is about celebrating and appreciating your own space that you’re in.” — Kelly Rowland
15. You deserve to put yourself first.
“Discover why you’re important, then refuse to settle for anyone who doesn’t completely agree.” — Fisher Amelie
16. You are strong on your own.
“You are the flame, not the moth. And your job is to burn with conviction.” — Heidi Priebe
17. The best relationship is the one you have with yourself.
“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” — Oscar Wilde
18. Having responsibility for shared happiness is risky.
“It is better to be single and unhappy than unhappily married.” — James C. Dobson
19. Do what’s best for you.
“It’s better to ‘stay single’ than being ‘single again.’” — Sharfaraz Ahmed
20. You validate your own existence.
“I don’t need a man to rectify my existence. The most profound relationship we’ll ever have is the one with ourselves.” — Shirley MacLaine
21. You know a joy not enough people understand.
“People would be a lot better off if they’d enjoy being single.” — Lewis Black
22. You’re too good.
“You’re single not because you are not good enough for one, it’s that you’re too good for the wrong one.” — Chris Burkmenn
23. Alone doesn’t have to mean lonely.
“I celebrate myself, and sing myself.” — Walt Whitman
24. The single life speaks to your resilience.
“Being single doesn’t make you weak, it means that you are strong enough to be on your own.” — Xavier Zayas
25. There’s nothing to fear.
“Don’t be scared to walk alone. Don’t be scared to like it.” — John Mayer
26. You won’t follow the crowd.
“Too many women throw themselves into romance because they’re afraid of being single.” — Julie Deply
27. You don’t have to share your time.
“Working long hours being single helps because your time is yours. Once you have a family your time isn’t all yours anymore.” — Andy Hertzfeld
28. No one else defines you.
“I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not defined by another person.” — Oscar Wilde
29. It’s really quite simple.
“I think, therefore I’m single.” — Liz Winston
30. You can be your own best friend.
“He is his own best friend, and takes delight in privacy whereas the man of no virtue or ability is his own worst enemy and is afraid of solitude.” — Aristotle
31. Or you can be solitude’s best friend.
“I never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude.” — Henry David Thoreau
32. Dating is expensive.
“I love being single. It’s almost like being rich.” — Sue Grafton
33. You are always enough.
“You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody.” — Maya Angelou
34. Relationships can be an illusion.
“Being single is getting over the illusion that there is somebody out there to complete you and taking charge of your own life.” — Omkar Phatakc
35. It’s a matter of gaining respect.
“If you truly want to be respected by people you love, you must prove to them that you can survive without them.” — Michael Bassey Johnson
36. Relationships aren’t a prerequisite for happiness.
“You don’t have to be part of a couple to be happy, you know.” — Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
37. You can be yourself.
“I’ve been single for a while and I have to say, it’s going very well. Like … it’s working out. I think I’m the one.” — Emily Heller
38. Surround yourself with friends.
“As a body everyone is single, as a soul never.” — Hermann Hesse
39. You are a rare beauty.
“When asked why I am single, my reply is simply; I consider myself a black pearl rare in my authenticity, adding a mysterious beauty to the select few who can recognize & even fewer who appreciate my worth.” — Sanjo Jendayi
40. It’s dedication to yourself.
“Taking solitude in stride was a sign of strength and of a willingness to take care of myself.” — Jenni Ferrari-Adler
41. You aren’t lonely.
“I don’t like to be labeled as lonely just because I am alone.” — Delta Burke
42. Sometimes you have to prove others wrong.
“People are really concerned about my relationship status. When I tell people I’m happy being single, they don’t believe me. They say: ‘You have to be miserable being alone.’” — Kelly Clarkson
43. It’s a choice.
“Single is no longer a lack of options — but a choice. A choice to refuse to let your life be defined by your relationship status but to live every day Happily and let your Ever After work itself out.” — Mandy Hale
44. It’s freedom.
“As highly sensitive individuals, we simply cannot stand feeling trapped, constricted or smothered in any way. We highly value our freedom and autonomy, making us particularly prone to staying single for long periods of time.” — Aletheia Luna
45. Romantic relationships are overrated. Friendships are where it’s at.
“Friends know the patterns of our souls.” — Ruth Buchanan
46. Your relationship with yourself is the most important.
“You do not need to be loved, not at the cost of yourself. The single relationship that is truly central and crucial n a life is the relationship to the self.” — Jo Coudert
47. Enjoy your freedom.
“Now I’m feeling how I should / Never knew single could feel this good.” — Jason Derulo
48. What would you prefer?
“I’d rather be alone than unhappy.” — Whitney Houston
49. You know the risk is very likely not worth it.
“Bad relationships are like a bad investment.” — Sonya Parker
50. There’s no shame in having fun.
“Being single is pretty good. It’s a nice sense of irresponsibility.” — Michael Douglas