Everyone struggles with something. Everyone. For me, that struggle was love. I was always the class clown, the guy who didn’t care about much. I was the laid back nice kid who always had to make people laugh. I fell into this role perfectly, so I played it. I loved people. The fact in this world there are billions of people, and every single one is different fascinated me, and still does. I was never nervous around anyone, in fact I flourished in situations where I had to meet and talk with different people. I was considered a “ladies man.” Never nervous to be the one guy at the school dance to go ask a girl to dance with me. I never was afraid to tell a girl she’s beautiful. I was never scared to ask a girl on a date. What I was afraid of was feelings.
I broke up with girls or stopped talking to them because they wanted to move forward and start doing things, whether it be sexual or more “official” type dates. The summer of my junior year in high school I lost my virginity in a car, with a special girl. It was the epitome of the “How I lost my virginity” stereotype. It was perfect. However, we ended up breaking up a week later, and it really hit hard. So I did what I did best, I flirted with as many girls as I could to get my mind off of the whole situation. I went on tons of chipotle and movie dates. Never letting anything go farther than that. Then I met her, and everything changed.
Seeing her that night at bdubs (buffalo wild wings), I knew I had to try. Her laugh, her hair, her skin, her body, everything about her was perfect. Absolutely perfect. So I did what I usually did, and somehow it worked. Except this time I couldn’t call it quits after the movie date. I told myself to, but I couldn’t get enough. There wasn’t a moment during the day when she wasn’t on my mind. She became my girlfriend and everything was perfect.
Pinterest became my