“A Guilt Life”

Excerpt: Thread of Guilt surround a person life. He still didn’t cope up from the memories and impact of the accident 20 year back. Things that went all wrong that night , still troubles him.

Memories of past still imprint in my mind , heart and soul.
I could never forget the incidences that turned my life upside down.

Each morning I wake up with same question, go out on work, return , relax and put off light remained unanswered.
I believe, everyone is alone in their own space where they hardly visit or never plan to return.
Life doesn’t change in years of hard work or efforts , if it has to change it will in just fraction of seconds which
I witnessed closely that night which seems to be more darker that it was. Time was like frozen ice , which awaits the air of suspense to melt it further.
Time never spare you for what you are or what you would like to become, it has it own way to mistreat you , and Guilt is like steam , impacts much more than real fire.
Though its a past , but guilt knock my door every day , smiling on my jeopardy.
On 11th June 2016 , I turned 54 years.
I have achieved almost everything I wished for. I have been successful entrepreneur in India.
In 2013 , I was listed in top ’50 Billionaires in Asia’.
In 2014, Ranked # 3 as ‘Highly influential person in South Asia.
I am founder and CEO of leading Clothing company ‘ TryUs’ and Chairman of Pharmaceutical chain ‘ Health4u’.
Due to my consistent hard work , ability to invest at low time and ‘Go-Getter spirit’ made me an inspiring factor for many upcoming business mind.
Some says I have ‘Midas touch’ , as Every time I go on holiday , I open a new business (or) venture.
Mergers, acquisition and tie-up are my favorite business task.
I reach a stage where my decision not only change the face of my own ventures but also impact country’s economy to larger extent.
I feel honored by being a ‘Padma Bhushan’ , the 3rd highest civilian award in India.
On occasion of my birthday today, my daughter ‘Shweta’ organised a party in our farmhouse tonight. All distinguished people will gather tonight to celebrate my 54th Birthday.
‘Farmhouse ?’ !!!! — After …

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What failed love does.

Excerpt: I still have all of the cute selfies she sent me, and all the happy pictures we took together, wondering to myself how someone can be so happy to be with you, and want nothing but you one second.

Everyone struggles with something. Everyone. For me, that struggle was love. I was always the class clown, the guy who didn’t care about much. I was the laid back nice kid who always had to make people laugh. I fell into this role perfectly, so I played it. I loved people. The fact in this world there are billions of people, and every single one is different fascinated me, and still does. I was never nervous around anyone, in fact I flourished in situations where I had to meet and talk with different people. I was considered a “ladies man.” Never nervous to be the one guy at the school dance to go ask a girl to dance with me. I never was afraid to tell a girl she’s beautiful. I was never scared to ask a girl on a date. What I was afraid of was feelings.

I broke up with girls or stopped talking to them because they wanted to move forward and start doing things, whether it be sexual or more “official” type dates. The summer of my junior year in high school I lost my virginity in a car, with a special girl. It was the epitome of the “How I lost my virginity” stereotype. It was perfect. However, we ended up breaking up a week later, and it really hit hard. So I did what I did best, I flirted with as many girls as I could to get my mind off of the whole situation. I went on tons of chipotle and movie dates. Never letting anything go farther than that. Then I met her, and everything changed.

Seeing her that night at bdubs (buffalo wild wings), I knew I had to try. Her laugh, her hair, her skin, her body, everything about her was perfect. Absolutely perfect. So I did what I usually did, and somehow it worked. Except this time I couldn’t call it quits after the movie date. I told myself to, but I couldn’t get enough. There wasn’t a moment during the day when she wasn’t on my mind. She became my girlfriend and everything was perfect.

Pinterest became my

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Excerpt: We started hanging out together daily. We went on dates and one day he proposed me in a very special and beautiful way.

It is the time when everyone passed his or her 12th standard. It is a turning point for everybody in career as well as love. Many relationships get apart because of the thought of the distance and some just casually break up but here, I am in love with somebody.

We started our relationship so causally on the note that we will never going to get serious about each other but that time who knows what will happen in future.

Our relationship started in 11th’s summer break. Summer breaks is the time when you don’t have things to do. It’s just time to rest, enjoy and family trips. I was having rest because my family did not go to any trip and there are some more people who are resting because there family also does not went anywhere. So we start meeting each other daily. There is this guy from whom I was getting attention. Also I just had break up a month ago and the guy also had break up some months ago. So we started bonding. The bonding was really good.

We started hanging out together daily. We went on dates and one day he proposed me in a very special and beautiful way. We were sitting in front of Jal Mahal and it’s 5AM and it was rainy season so the view, the air, the moment and everything were mesmerizing. He proposed ,I said yes. There were lots and lots of moments, which we spent together. We started sharing the top secret of our lives to each other and we realized that our life is really complicated. We decided that we would only make each other happy because there are many more things, which easily can upset us.

Biggest problem of Indian relationships is we ends it by saying there is no future of our relationship as our family will not going to accept us. It’s good to thought about future but seriously why, at least first see if your relationship will go to that extent or not. Yeah so, we passed our 12th and I don’t know fortunately or unfortunately but our course and college will be same but I asked him what happened, he replied “I am confused, Now as we …

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The Uncertainty

Excerpt: Where the old relations were getting loosen enough, she was getting bonded with Ariyan more and more.

People say time changes people, or in reality, times can show us the real face or nature of people. Ipshita is very practical and can accept the changes in people with time. Time was changing, equations of her life were also changing with the change of time. Raj and she met rarely nowadays. Raj is very happy and excited to start his new life where there is no more fear of losing Ipshita.

Anisha and Meenakshi were also about to finish their graduate studies and only 3-4 months are remaining of their togetherness. Though like all others Ipshita and her soul sisters were promising to be together forever. Somehow Ipshita knew there was a change between Anisha and Meenakshi’s connection which will make the bonding loose and may be faded away.

Raj already has gone mentally before his actual farewell from the city, now he doesn’t call or message frequently. Ipshita is still trying to be well connected to Raj, but Raj seems quite destructed and pulled away from her. She was not happy about this matter she started feeling lonely even in the crowd. Sometimes she feels less connected to Anisha and Meenakshi also nowadays. She is trying her best to keep her stable and to keep everyone together. She knows everything going to change soon drastically. Her friends her comfort zone is at the edge of their bonding.

Where the old relations were getting loosen enough, she was getting bonded with Ariyan more and more. All her loneliness and wishes were getting fulfilled by Ariyan. Ariyan started knowing her little better than before. He is getting attached to her day by day, this bonding was amazing platonic connections, which can only be felt. They like each other’s company they keep talking for hours after office.

She felt tremendous happiness but fear inside if she has to give up on this closeness also means. Where she will go, who will listen to her and give her a safe hand to ride throughout her path. 2 more months remained and after this, she doesn’t know who will be there with her Raj or Ariyan??

“The present is the best present you can give to anyone”, Ipshita uttered to Ariyan.

She was lost about the future thought of losing Ariyan forever. After the

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Back to start

Excerpt: The story has just begun and now I know if it is not love then it also not friendship. May be in between some where.

I never thought in my whole teenage life that I would ever experience that thing ,the thing which people at my age call love. I always felt that teenage people can get attracted to a person but love is big word. I mean although it is a four letter word but the hindi cinema and society makes it a big deal . Well it was not that big , I mean you never invite Love, you feel it.

After my school life , I was left with one year to find my passion and study for entrance exam . Studying all day made me bored so I used to go to this park side near my house . As I was literally in my last teenage years so I was willing to explore all new stuff .

One day I saw this guy looking at me from far away , I thought may be he wanted to say something . But he went away . Next day on my way to park in the morning , I heard the sound of cycle behind me . It was strange because normally people come by foot . So I turned my head and saw this guy with the uniform of some college I guess with wet hair and a bag on back . He started cycling with my speed and asked me my name and as kind of formality I asked his. He actually wanted my physics copy for notes as he heard from some people that I was preparing and so was he for the entrance exam.

Well when a guy with a cute smile asks you that or want something how can you say no. In the evening I gave him my copy and with that my heart . Now every morning was a happy morning for me as I used to see him . For the first time I was so open to a boy who was just my friend. For the next six months we met in the roads , in parks , in coaching classes but never shared phone number .

He was a gentle man , when in winter the morning used to be a little dark he used to

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The Power of Destiny!

As I walked home on a hot scorching day in Delhi, I stumbled on a wallet that someone had dropped accidentally in the street. Immediately I bent down; picked it up; opened it; and looked inside to find some sort of identification which would help me trace its owner. But the wallet contained only 3-one rupee notes and a crumpled letter that appeared to have been there for several years.

The envelope was tattered and all that was legible was the return address. I opened the letter hoping to find some clue of the receiver and the sender. The date on which the letter was written was marked as 13.12. 1957- Yes it was written about 60 years ago.

The beautiful hand writing appeared to be that of a lady and it was written on a pink stationary paper with a small flower on the right-hand corner. It read ‘Dearest Anurag’ that told the recipient that  the writer was not in a position to see him any more as her mother was totally against their love affair and forbade her from meeting him anymore. .  She continued to write that her love for him was eternal and hence wrote this letter without the knowledge of her mother. It bore the signature of the letter as Preeti.

It was a lovely letter, but other than the name Preeti there was no other way by which the owner could be identified. Probably if I could contact the telephone operator in the Telephone exchange, that person may be able to help me with the phone listing of the return address, if the address is still traceable after 60 long years!  It was just a chance, which I was taking!  

I dialled the telephone exchange and on hearing a lady’s voice, “Madam, Good morning! I have a very unusual request and hope you will be able to help me with it.”.

“Yes Good morning, go ahead please”.  

I began, “I am trying to locate the owner of a wallet which I found on the roadside. Would you be able to tell me whether there is a telephone number for the address that is written on the envelope?”She urged me to speak to her boss who would be in a better position to help me out on this matter, who, after a minute’s hesitation, ‘Well, we do have a phone listing at the address specified …

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Love forever – Ateet ka Parinda – 1

वो शाम फ़िर तन्हा ना होना था…मगर तन्हाई बोलकर थोड़े ही आती है
जब याद आती है तब ही तन्हा होता हूँ और जब भी तन्हा होता हूँ वो ही याद आती है शाम के ५;३० बजे, नवंबर ११,२००८
ऐसा लगता है अब वो समझ चुकी है मेरे मन की बात….ना कुछ बोल रही है ना कुछ सुन रही है
ख़ामोशी अगर सब कुछ ना बयां करे नज़रें सब कुछ बोल देती हैं
चुप रहना काँटों की तरह चुभ रहा था, मगर बोल भी नहीं सका क्योंकि जुबान लड़खड़ा रहे थे
ना उसने कुछ कहा ना मैंने कुछ सुना, मगर दिल की आवाज़ सीधा दिल पे लगती है
आज ऐसा क्यों लग रहा था की सब कुछ झूठा था, प्यार तो झूठे थे ही जस्बात भी झूठे थे, आरजू झूठी थी तमन्ना झूठी थी
ना उसने समझा मेरे जूनून को, ना मैंने जाना उसके शुकुन को
घंटों निकल गए मगर दो बोल ना बोल सके हम, सिसकियाँ निकलती रही और हमें छोड़ गए सनम दोपहर ३ बजे….जुलाई १६,२०१६
कम्बख्त बारिश को भी अभी आना था….ना छाता ना छुपने की जगह….
एक तो पहले ही लेट हूँ ऊपर से बारिश
चलो थोड़ा दौड़कर ही सही, ये बस स्टॉप बचा लेगी मुझे अरे मैडम क्या कर रही हैं….संभल के! वो तो संभाल गयी मगर मैं नहीं संभाल सका खुद को….
सब कुछ निकल गया अतीत के पन्नों को टटोलकर बस एक घटके में
वो सहमी, देखा और फिर से सहम गयी….
मानो उसे करंट छूकर निकल गयी हो और फिर भी झटके हज़ार दे गयी हो नज़रें हैरान थी, निगाहें परेशान थी….दिल कह रहा था पूछ लूँ सब कुछ….
खैरियत से रुख़्साने तक….तन्हाईयों से फ़साने तक…. भरोसा नहीं हो रहा था ये वही है जिसके साथ जिंदगी साथ गुजरने की कसमें खायीं थीं…. ऐसा लग रहा था जैसे कल की ही बात हो…. नहीं राहुल तुम कभी पैसे की अहमियत नहीं समझ पाए….मुझे उधार की जिंदगी नहीं चाहिए
प्यार तो मैं तुम्हे खुद से भी ज्यादा करती हूँ मगर सिर्फ प्यार से जिंदगी नहीं चलती न
मैं तुम्हारे साथ जिंदगी गुजार सकती हूँ मगर तुम ही बताओ बिना पैसे के जिंदगी कैसी? मुझे पता है तुम मुझे खुश रखोगे मगर मुझे जिंदगी में और भी बहुत कुछ चाहिए राहुल….
एक ही जिंदगी है , मैं अभाव में नहीं बिताना चाहती…. दोपहर ३:१५ बजे….जुलाई १६,२०१६ मम्मा मैं आ गई…
अरे बेटा रुको, क्या कर रही हो, भींग जाओगी…..ऐसे नहीं बेटा!
मम्मा पप्पा कहाँ …

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Tring Tring: Its Love not attachment

After relaxing holidays with my parents in Himachal Pradesh, I was back to the same routine.  The call rings “Tring Tring”   

I  could hear a soft spoken lady from the other side, who introduced herself as  Mrs. Dasgupta

“Hello Sukanya, I am Mrs. Dasgupta talking from Delhi, I got your contact details from Jeevansathi.com. We are looking for a prospective bride for my younger brother Naboneel”

I was neutral. No excitement.  This was quite normal for me. Since the past 12 months I had put my profile on Jeevansathi.com, hoping to find my second life partner.

Every other day I received an alliance related call and it had become an integral part of my daily life. At the point of time, I jotted down a two-page documents regarding my  introduction and it had become byheart, A series of interrogate questions which were generally ask by the perspective alliance, I wanted to be overprepared after my disaster first innings but at this stage I byhearted with my introduction and confidently face the interrogate session.

I walked back home and started my preparation for cookie, which is generally my half time task. Cooking for me  is like stress relief therapy which I normally do after my college hour to relax from my  fully  packed schedule.

Since  it was my first  attempt  to bake cookies, I was bit confused and lost in the subtleties of the process of baking cookies.

As my hands neared the microwave, and I opened its door – came a sound from nowhere.

“Beep Beep”

The msg read  “Ami Naboneel bolchi, Apnar contact details didi tike pelam (Naboneel  speaking, I got your contact details from my elder sister)” I was really surprised!!  A man speaking with so much of respect, I was overwhelmed.

For a few moments Back to my previous phase of my life “Partha my ex-husband who never refer “tumi” to me always use “tui”. Never give respect to me nor to my parents first time ever  heard “Appni” from  man and that touched my heart.


Microwave time alert stop  “and I  smell the aroma of the cookies .

Time flies but memories continue to remain in our heart.

After completing my dinner, Its mother time (The only time where I talk heart to heart with my mother), I discussed my  entire day with her, she is the only woman in my life who listen …

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The Unexpected

Ipshita, an ambitious girl who is looking for growth, betterment, and true love. She joined recently in a small developing company with a good package. She loves to give a challenge to every arena of her life and to get expertise in most possible areas. Until then her life was going well, she had a few good friends, a good job and a decent lifestyle, lovable and frank parents and most importantly a supportive younger brother. She was very popular among everyone always for her sense of humor and attractive personality. She was doing well in every aspect of her life but continued to expect her dream man and the love and future partner of her life.


It was her first day in the new office and she reported on time and started working on joining formalities. Post of this joining stuff she has been forwarded to her department, now its time for her to explore new people. She met her new team and boss, she met a few of her colleagues and co-workers also still a lot to continue. Her new office colleagues seemed to be quite open-minded and friendly to her, which matches her personality. Overall the first day went well apart from the fact that she might not remember her way home.

chat mania:

It is Saturday the first weekend of her new job. Ipshita doesn’t have any plans yet. Just like other weekends she wakes up a little late and continued to carry on with her weekend routines with friend cum roomies. Once she switched on the data pack apart from her routine good morning wishes, her mobile screen pops up with 6-7 messages from a new contact. It seems to be a senior from her new office, who stayed more nearest to her location. Unlikely the fact that she is a little bit reserved and doesn’t like to entertain unknown people much, she was very enthusiastic and happy to receive messages from him. That day up to evening Ipshita and her senior Ariyan chatted a lot. She started knowing him, but so surprised by the fact that how in that much short period he felt to share his stuff with her.

Its been 2 weeks already passed, she has been quite adjusted with her new office and the working environment. She made few friends too. She is happy about this new bonding, with her …

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Unanswered Questions

Rosa Magdalina looked straight into her reflection in the golden lit mirror in front of her, she placed some crimson lipstick on with more intensity than necessary, the drying pink roses in the vase next to her softened the drama a touch, but i’m sure even they felt the intensity in her demeanor. She turned and left into the softly lit streets of Paris. Clutching her purse, in which lay a train ticket, a love note of the boy who would never know where she left to, a photo of a little girl, her sister, who now would be a fine young lady, probably married with children. Although Rosa would never know.

Her heels make a soft clicking sound on the cobbled streets as she walks, it’s hauntingly quiet tonight, a tear stains her cheek. She clutches her purse tighter, turns down the street to the train station and never looks.


Andre awoke, the bed was cold, the room was quiet, a soft dampening, drowning panic hit when he saw a note in place of Rosa. He didn’t want to read it, he knew it would break his heart. That beautiful girl, with untold stories in her eyes, he knew she had left. 

He felt the signs yesterday, she hadn’t said anything to let on. But there was an urgency in the way she kissed him… like it was a goodbye. There was a sadness in the way she had looked at him. And a unsettledness about her as they lay in bed.. But he pushed that feeling away and fell asleep. Hoping he’d wake up and she would be normal, making pancakes in the kitchen, hot coffee already made…

But no. Nothing but empty silence.

He should have kissed her longer, told her how he loved her, held her in his arms and begged her to tell him her troubles..

But here he is; alone in the empty silence filled with unanswered questions.

He drank the half glass of red wine left on her nightstand. He sadly didn’t have the heart to convince himself that perhaps she’d return sometime… or ever. He knew all too well, a girl like Rosa, with so many untold stories in her eyes, wasn’t the type…

He places the note in a box of precious things. He’ll read it some other time, some time in the future when the love they had shared …

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